Chikara Report - “Thunderball”

(pointless grammar disclaimer – I wrote this post in stream-of-consciousness mode. Expect lots of pointless parenthetical references, a few side rants, but hopefully, a little bit of fun)

I started this trip – my third trip to see Chikara - with a bit of self-pity. I drove by myself to Gibsonville, NC. I live in Southwest Virginia, so it was a 4 1/2 hour drive. Because of the distance, I really wanted to have a companion with me, because I know that wrestling is more fun when you experience it with your friends. But I procrastinated on whether I was actually going to go or not, and after a few “solid maybes” (+1gratuitous Grizzly Bear Egg Cafe reference), I found on Friday night that I had no one to come with me. I had to make a decision – go by myself, risk feeling alone, depressed, anxious...or sit at home and feel sorry for myself, feeling alone, depressed, and anxious. The decision was obvious. I had to go, even if I went by myself. Besides, I know that I've felt appreciated and happy at previous Chikara shows, and I thought I might even make a few acquaintances/friends.

I arrived at the Mid-Atlantic Sportatorium around 5:45/6 pm or so. I got in line. I talked a little bit to people in line, but I was feeling pretty self-conscious about being alone. It seemed like everyone around me had a companion. I was so determined to see Chikara, though, that I choked down those emotions that would usually make me panic and run away. And I'm so glad I did.

Since I was alone, I wanted to upgrade to a front row or second row seat if I could. Sadly, front and second row seats were sold out. It was okay though - after I walked into the Sportatorium and saw the layout, I knew General Admission would work just fine. Besides, it's not like I could get angry with the esteemed Mr. Leonard Chikarason, because he has a handsome beard. As a bearded man myself, I appreciate a good beard.

It also meant I could spend a little bit more money from my budget. I wasn't sure what I wanted to buy first. I browsed around a little, then bought a copy of You Only Live Twice. I went to the show (another great road trip that I should write about), but didn't have the greatest view from my seat. I wanted to see it again. As a bonus, it meant that I could show my little brother some Chikara.

[personal side note: my bro is adopted, 12 years old. I live with my parents (yeah yeah, I live up to the stereotype of the obsessive indy wrestling fan), and my parents decided to try to work out a living situation with a couple of kids in therapeutic foster care. It's been a long, emotionally trying, but awesome year, and my parents adopted a kid who is really cool. I can't imagine life without him now. For legal reasons, though, I really can't drop his name or show a picture. Why am I telling you this, fair reader? Well, he'll come up quite a bit in this blog post, because he's become a big (and awesome) part of my life.]

Also, I remember hearing one of the members of the Devastation Corporation (I'm not sure which one as I wasn't looking up at the time) telling another fan who was buying King of Trios, “hey, spoiler alert: WE WIN.” I will grudgingly admit that the Devastation Corporation are really funny and talented – I'm just more of a fan of tecnicos. I likes the good guys more than the bad guys. Having said that, they were absolutely hilarious. They were offering fans a chance to eat nacho cheese off their King of Trios medals for $100. This me realize that I wanted to buy King of Trios as well. Eventually, I got to do that. Couldn't do the nacho cheese thing though. I'm trying to lose a few pounds, and not only is nacho cheese bad, but I can only imagine the empty calories that come from licking the awesome off a King of Trios medal.

Then I turned to tables full of t-shirts. Behind those tables were several Chikara stars. I immediately caught the glance of Juan Francisco de Coronado. I remembered that during the World Cup, I sent him a tweet saying that I would cheer for Ecuador in the WC, if only due to an extreme hatred of Karim Benzema (boring sports side rant: for those who don't know, Karim Benzema is a soccer player. He plays for Real Madrid AND non-Zinidine Zidane France. In my illogical sports homerism, that means he is 2/3 of the way to being pure evil. If he were to sign with the New York Jets at the end of his soccer career, he would be full on superevil, like Dr. Doom or Magneto or Bill Belicheck). Of course, Ecuador and France played to a 0-0 draw. Actually, it was a good result for Ecuador, especially considering they were down to 10 players after a really bad red card, but it didn't eliminate the evil French from the tournament. I blame my rooting for Ecuador as the reason they didn't win (why? I'm a Buffalo Bills fan AND an LA Dodgers fan AND a Buffalo Sabres fan. I'm used to my favorite teams choking on the biggest stages and also [sarcasm]EVERYTHING IS ABOUT ME[/sarcasm]) JFDC said that there's always next time. I appreciate the spirit, and I mean he did sell out the Ecuadome twice. He asked if I had been to see Chikara before. I told him I saw “Klunk in Love” in Kingsport, TN in 2011 (and I would love to see Chikara back in Kingsport because it's only 35 minutes from my house, and it was a really good show, even if the bottom rope and middle rope didn't cooperate. Maybe that's why they didn't come back. Baseless speculation? I'm good at that) and YOLT. He's actually a pretty nice person. I feel bad that I didn't buy something from him...but...choices choices choices.

Icarus was standing behind some of his shirts. I felt this huge surge of anxiety. Here was the grand champion, right before me. I really wanted to talk to him, but had no idea what to say. I kind of stuttered and stammered at first. I remembered that I wanted to buy an “I have Icarus's Back” t-shirt. I liked that shirt a lot. There was one right in front of me. I asked if he had a 2XL...he only had a 3XL, the one on the table. The shirt was also stained. Honestly, neither of those things bothered me – but I think it's cool that he pointed it out. Then he told me that Southwest Airlines was at fault. Apparently, they'd somehow ruined his bag of t-shirts, and the only option they offered him to solve the problem was dry cleaning. Dry cleaning a t-shirt? Ridiculous. Icarus said “don't fly Southwest.” I will definitely take that advice, because come on – Icarus, flight, who would know better? Strangely enough, the stains were kind of brown when I bought it, but when I washed it, it looks like someone used yellow highlighter all over the shirt. It's fine, I like it the way it is.

I also wanted to thank Icarus for his role in the Ashes of Chikara saga. I can only speak for myself, but I can't imagine Chikara would have returned with such force and passion if Icarus didn't work so hard to bring it back. He may have done some pretty cruel things in the past, but his road to redemption has been really inspiring. It's a really cool story. I have enjoyed it. He also sent me a nice personal message on the 101 after I wrote a blog post for phase 2 of building his air force, and it made my day. I thanked him for that. He said “the fans made that work.” True, but take some credit sir – without a leader, it would have never worked. But that also triggered some...

FEELINGS OF GUILT #1 (dun dun dun) (also this is boring stuff about my life, not about Chikara, so it will be in parenthesis and spoiler form because it's not really germane to the actual report)

During the Ashes saga/angle/thingy I finished the first two phases, but flaked out on the third part. There's a part of me that feels like the world's biggest idiot for my failure. I'm not going to make excuses – instead, I'll offer an explanation of where my mind was at that point. To be fair to myself, I was also going through some very turbulent changes with my family and our living situation (remember the foster care stuff? Yeah, no specifics, but family tension was at a huge high point). This stress pushed me into some self-destructive behavioral patterns. When I start to crumble like that, I often just disconnect from the world, and stop paying attention to my friends and family. I also start some really self-destructive behavior. I feel sorry for myself and my lot in life. I can get really selfish really fast. Then, I get upset with myself for being too selfish, and I tag in a guilt complex. It's a vicious cycle, and one I'd really like to break. And so, as days went by, the more I wanted to run away. I felt like I let Chikara down. It also triggered the memories of trying to get a /r/squaredcircle podcast going, then flaking out when I started to realize it was going to be harder than I imagined at first. I hate this side of myself – the side that makes promises that I don't keep. I use those feelings of guilt to make myself feel worthless. Those feelings of worthlessness caused me to continually isolate myself from the world. This is a continual theme in my life, especially when I get depressed. There's a part of me that feels horrible about myself, like I've let a lot of people down on a consistent basis. It's not the first time I've felt this way. It's a sad pattern in my life that I have started projects that were really good ideas but flamed out so fast because I didn't live up to my own deadlines. Then I feel angry at myself, hurt myself, then follow it up with some self-pity. I don't build myself up, I break myself down. My adult life has been marked by Major Depressive Disorder and Panic Disorder. It effects me on a daily basis, not just mentally and emotionally, but physically. It drains me of energy. It clouds my judgment. It continually crushes me. I have tried a lot of medications and therapy, and while they give me some relief, it never really goes away. It's a constant cycle of perpetual self-hatred. The shortest way I can explain this – and I tried to explain it a little in the other blog post I wrote – is that my mind works in strange ways. I am really good at negative self-talk, and not so great at being positive about myself. At times, I feel like the worst human being in the history of this planet. Those feelings lead me to mentally crush myself, telling myself that I will never do anything worthwhile, and if the slightest thing goes wrong in a plan that I'm making, then I am ruining everything. This brings some pretty awful thoughts. When I feel really bad about myself, I will do things that I know will hurt me in the long run, in order to feel numb to the world. It's not just having a bad day or two – it's a constant pattern of self-destruction. I have come a very long way in my life – done a lot of positive things, especially in the last year – but these feelings just never go away. I don't feel sorry for myself – I could have been dealt a far worse hand in life – but my adult life has been marked by pointless self-destruction. I am proactively trying to change this now, but there have been many times where I didn't want to change; I wanted to continue to feel sorry for myself. It's a harsh realization that I've been hurting myself for a long time, but it is something I can turn around. And gradually, in the last year, I've been doing that. Having something like Chikara out there that brings me unlimited joy, no strings attached, inspires me to do better and to improve even more. We all need happiness. Chikara makes me happy. I have pushed myself hard in the last year to become a better, more reliable person. It's a process, but I can see myself changing in ways I never imagined I could. I'm excited for the future. But there's a lot of work to do. That triggers huge amounts of stress inside me, and makes me far too anxious. Chikara is one of those things that helps me relax. So if I come off as obnoxiously enthusiastic in my fandom...so be it. I really don't care how that makes me look. I am passionate in my fandom. As long as I stick to the ideals of ethical, empathetic behavior, I don't care if someone else thinks I look silly. And that does good things for my self-confidence. And there's another random thing. The third part of the Ashes thing, iirc, was to form trios and post at other forums. This is where I flaked out...but in my defense, I was definitely posting about Chikara at a forum I frequent. I was actually spreading the word to others. I got in an embarrassing argument over it. Another poster called Chikara “trash”, and that infuriated me. I got really self-righteous about it. I knew I was being trolled – badly – but I kept fighting. I wasn't going to let that person dissuade anyone else from checking out Chikara. There was way too much cursing, and not enough fun involved in the conversation. When I started to realize that I was melting down over someone's (bad) opinion, I felt really, really stupid for getting in the argument in the first place. So I never said anything or showed anyone. I felt like a bad representative of Chikara. Swearing all over the place, saying mean things – I was doing it. I'm not proud of it in any way, shape, or form. I learned a lesson from it; I need to be less sensitive to the haters. Better to say nothing than to be negative. TL;DR of this side rant – I can be a bit obnoxious and forceful when I really like something. I also crumble when I feel like I let anyone down, and I run away way too easily, setting up feelings of guilt. Chikara helps keep me happy when I get frustrated and upset. OMG that was entirely too much writing and self-sharing...but it was cathartic, and I'm not going to apologize for that]

ANYWHOOOO...when I get really nervous and anxious, I can also become really confused. So...I was wandering aimlessly at the entrance to the main room, zoned out in my own thoughts. A staff member asked me if he could help – it was so kind. I told him that I was just deciding where to sit. He repeated what Leonard Chikarason said: anywhere but the front two rows of chairs. I meandered over to the far corner of the room, on the bleachers, and took a seat. I pulled out my cell phone and tried to look important. Suddenly the familiar Chikara theme blasted out over the speakers. Gavin Loudspeaker came out to the ring. Gavin, as always, fired up the crowd. I immediately felt relaxed. This was familiar. This was what I came for. This was Chikara – the greatest lucha libre super party in the world, and I was invited. I started to feel like...even being alone, this was where I wanted to be. This was a place that I belonged – at least for a few hours on a Saturday night. I was home. Welcome home. (+1 Neon Genesis Evangelion Reference)

I realize that I have rambled for entirely too long without talking about the 'rasslin. Yes, since North Carolina is south of the Mason-Dixon line, this is the area where “wrestling” becomes “'RASSLIN.”

(obnoxious social geography/culture rant: In all seriousness, I have found that the south has a ton of great 'rasslin fans. Being a transplanted Yankee (I grew up in a small town about an hour from Buffalo/Niagara Falls/Rochester), I know that makes me a money-grubbing, swindling, charismatic but evil bandit of a man (yankee self-defense side note: I promise, I totally haven't participated in the worldwide Yankee conspiracy to steal money from the elderly and the downtrodden. I would NEVER set up a Ponzi scheme to directly deposit cash into my bank account. Not that you know of at least and oh man why am I writing this). The 'rasslin has helped me make friends with some really cool people in these parts. Point: 'rasslin is Wrestling and it's great, it can help a Yankee bond with a good ol' boy/girl and I really like that)

So why haven't I started talking about the 'rasslin? Let's get down to the fussin' and fightin' already!

MATCH #1: The Bloc Party vs The Spectral Envoy

(short disclaimer: Instead of rating the match or giving a play-by-play, I'm going to go with the random thoughts method. I'm writing this in stream-of-consciousness mode. I have a decent memory, but it is entirely possible I will get something wrong here/recap events out of order. Humans make mistakes. I'm human. I think. I HOPE.)

(Also, unnecessary side rant, but something I've wanted to say about match ratings: this is just my opinion, but I find that rating wrestling matches can lead to really dumb arguments that hurt careers and influence powerful people to do ridiculous things. I'm being as vague as possible, but I could point to several examples I see of this. As Quack said on episode #185 of the Art of Wrestling, “Art is subjective.” I think that putting a rating on a match makes no sense because it's not the rating that matters, it's the review itself. We know subjectively what we like as the audience, and my five-star match could be a three-star match in other people's opinion. Describing things I liked/hated is way better than just slamming a number on a match. Having said that, I also realize a lot of people like ratings and use them to decide what to watch. There's a part of me that dislikes the fact that people may buy shows based on ratings that are often arbitrary, and there's a bigger part of me that dislikes the idea that wrestler's livelihoods are affected by star ratings. It bothers me very strongly that people's careers are affected by a few powerful fans saying “I like this/I hate that.” Having a passion for pro wrestling doesn't give you license to monetize your opinion and slam other people publicly because you don't like what you see. The dirt sheets ruin careers, and a lot of sites that just copy the news from the dirt sheets can have an impact on a wrestler's ability to make money in the future. I honestly believe this when it comes to SOME sites (definitely not all, it's not a blanket statement. I know that at heart I am a kind, empathetic person and I try to treat people as I'd want to be treated. It drives me just a little insane that people make money for talking poop about wrestlers and throwing out baseless speculation. I know there's a business aspect to wrestling, and I know that it is important, and I find it really annoying that writers with large audiences mindlessly slam people/promotions without thinking for a second about what their words could do to a wrestler's career. It's a tough business, but it doesn't mean that you have to completely lack empathy. So, the next time you write something about an event you attend, I would suggest not writing anything that you wouldn't be willing to say to that person's face and accept the consequences of that reaction. Just my two cents – I wanted to drop an opinion here. If you actually did read this, I would love some feedback. Give me your opinion in the comments. FEED. ME. MORE. COMMENTS)

*Prakash Sabar has my favorite mask amongst current Chikara wrestlers, bar none. I also love how his offense is similar to 1-2-3 Kid, but not exactly the same.
*Gavin's intro for Mr. Azerbaijan was so good. I also imagine that winning the Sexiest Man in Azerbaijan award would be a bit easy with such a sweet moustache.
*One thing I really appreciate about the Spectral Envoy is that you can put them anywhere in an event, from opening match to the main event, and they are always great. Frightmare is a ball of kinetic energy, Hallowicked is imposing and hard-hitting, and I don't think I have to say much about Ultramantis Black – he's popular for good reason. I definitely point to Ultramantis Black when I talk to others about wrestlers that inspire me.
*”Boaring” is one of my favorite chants in Chikara right now. I like silly puns, even if Ricky Gervais thinks they're the “lowest form of comedy." I mean, what does Ricky Gervais know about comedy, it's not like he's made all these great comedy series or anything... (question for self: would winky face emoticon denote the right amount of sarcasm here? Or maybe just another pointless adventure in the parenthesis)
*These guys worked really hard to get the crowd into the match. It was cool.
*The Spectral Envoy won, and the crowd loved it. Perfect way to start the night.
*FEELINGS OF GUILT RANT #2 (no trigger warning needed here) – looking back on the night, I wish I had bought something from the Spectral Envoy. My 12-year old brother and I constantly had a blast playing WWE 2K14 with downloaded Chikara characters. I usually took Ultramantis Black (but mixed it up with Hallowicked every now and then), and he loved Frightmare's move set – Frightmare was his second favorite after Rey Mysterio. We beat the Shield for the first time with UMB and Frightmare, and it was awesome. It took a created gorilla with Rey Mysterio's moveset and a Pink Ninja to beat them. If you keep pace with a gorilla and a ninja, you know you're doing something right. The cool part, though, is that the Spectral Envoy, in a way, have helped a 35-year old bond with a 12-year old. I think it's cool that wrestling can do that. Also, in my defense, I bought an Ultramantis Black adult mask for myself and a Frightmare kid's mask for my little bro at YOLT. So I don't feel THAT bad. I mean, I can't buy everything (yet...until the money from my Yankee Ponzi scheme starts flowing and oh man did I just type that for everyone to see? Whoops. I would never swindle grandmothers out of their money. EVER. That you know of. Also, one of the most fun things from the car trip home from YOLT was putting on the mask and pressing my face and hands against the window. Every now and then, someone looked over, and the reactions were hilarious, lots of double takes

I barely had time to calm down from Match #1 when Gavin came out and announced that the next match was the “Magic Move” match. It took a second for me to remember what that meant. Thankfully, Gavin explained it. A random move was pulled out of a lottery bin of random moves by Bryce was the “Magic Move.” If the magic move happened during the match, EVERYONE GETS A PRIZE! Yay free stuff!

The magic move was body slam. I felt really good about the chance for that to happen in...

MATCH #2: The Aftermath vs 3.0

*I would have had no idea who the Aftermath were if I hadn't seen a comment on the 101 about them, with a link to one of their matches. Props to whoever posted that, and they were right, the Aftermath were really good. Trevor Lee in particular was impressive. That guy has some serious talent.
*I thought the crowd was a bit flat at the beginning, but credit to both teams, they really worked hard to get a reaction. The passion, the energy started to transfer to the crowd.
*They made great use of the “magic move” stipulation. Note to the more corporate wrestling giants: if you're going to use a stipulation in a match, it should affect the match. The constant teasing of a body slam, only to hit other moves, built tension, and when the body slam finally connected, the crowd roared.
*I have to be honest. When I looked at this card, I didn't expect much from this match. When I think about it now, though, it was a really great match. The moves were crisp, great timing and execution. Just great 'rasslin. Very fun to watch.
*I am a much bigger 3.0 fan than I was before. Those guys worked their tails off. Well...they didn't have tails to begin with.
*Since the body slam was done in the match, everyone got a sticker (specifically the one with “I AM” then the mask). I already got one of these at You Only Live Twice, so I asked the guy next to me if he would like it. He said he had a stepson that wanted to come but couldn't – and he had a sticker to give him now. Awesome, I was happy to hear that it would be put to good use. I have read stories about the generosity of other Chikara fans, and that sort of positivity is contagious. I want to be part of that. It was only a sticker, true, but it reinforced something I know quite well: if you truly love something, you should find ways to share it with others. This is a reminder for myself to remember to pick up something for someone who really wants it at the next show I go to. FEELINGS OF GUILT #3 are hitting me as I write this, as I feel like I was a bit selfish. I could have probably bought something for someone else. I will rectify that in the future, but for now...

The next match would help me to relax a lot more. It was time for....

MATCH #3: “Smooth Sailing” Ashley Remington vs Juan Francisco de Coronado

*First chance to see Bryce refereeing! Bryce Remsburg is a national treasure. If Bryce Remsburg were a soccer referee, he'd be Pierluigi Collina (+1 obscure sports reference).
*Juan Francisco de Coronado came out first. Slowly. A few fans threw streamers for him. He said something but I felt that same weird drowsy feeling I felt earlier when he took the mic. Something about Germans and Suplexes. Again, he was very nice to me, I don't know why I felt so tired when he started to talk.
*Waking up to Ashley Remington striding to the ring was awesome. In my opinion, he's the breakout star of Season 14. I remember being really impressed by him at YOLT, despite having never seen him before. More on this guy later.
*Really fun match – AR hitting the ropes, then stopping in front of JFDC and doing the double guns was a personal highlight.
*I BREAK ON ONE MY GOOD MAN.
*Ashley Remington's German suplex is a thing of beauty.
*I was SHOCKED that JFDC didn't destroy the fruit basket. Beautiful fruit basket though. Looked nutritious and/or delicious. Props to JFDC for being sensible.

I think at this point, I realized how comfortable I really felt and how much fun I was having. It didn't matter that I came by myself – the reaction of the crowd, the intimacy of the venue – I couldn't possibly feel alone or isolated there. Also, I realized what an awesome spot I had picked, as this huge fan was blowing air behind me, and I felt a bit warm. If I have ever “chillaxed” in my life, this was it. And things were about to get funky up in this house...

MATCH #4: The Osirian Portal vs Oleg the Usurper/???? ??????????? aka Flex Rumblecrunch

*Alright, so my first Chikara show was three years ago, in Kingsport, TN. It was about a month before “High Noon” - the show was “Klunk in Love.” One thing I will never forget is Ophidian darting (slithering maybe?) through the crowd, approaching us and talking to us. My friend Derek was wearing a “Chuck Norris for President” t-shirt (ugh, I know, Chuck Norris jokes are like, so 2011 but wait the show was in 2011 so...), and Ophidian came up to us and bowed down to the shirt. It was really cool. We took pictures with him (and his sweaty headgear). He was the first Chikara wrestler I interacted with in any way, and I was so nervous...but he was so nice that it was hard to stay nervous. It was also a time in my life where I didn't want people taking pictures of me – so to pose for a pic was a big deal. It meant a lot to me. Since the Portal didn't wrestle at YOLT, I definitely wanted to see them in action, and they didn't disappoint.
*Another cool interaction was at YOLT, when Amasis was handing out stuff to people in line. I thought he was like Santa Claus – a funky Santa Claus though. The Santa Clause 4: Funky Claus, a movie that exists only in my brain. FOR NOW. He retweeted it. I love those little interactions – again, they're really meaningful.
*Oleg the Usurper is really good at running the ropes. It's fun to watch.
*Ophidian is officially my favorite wrestler in Chikara now. Everything he does is stylish. Totally nice guy too.
*I really wanted the Portal to win. That was my (early) birthday wish. It happened! I was all like Overly excited Jessie Spano. (just like it except I wasn't scared, and no caffeine pills, but hey Saved By the Bell references are the best right?)

It was time for intermission. I saw Bryce behind the t-shirt table, with Da Bryce is Right t-shirt sitting there. I definitely wanted that shirt...which he only had in a Large. I'm kind of a tubster right now, so I wasn't sure it would fit, but worst case scenario was that I'd give it to my bro and he could be the coolest kid in school (upon wearing it, it actually does fit fairly well, and gives me the incentive to lose a few pounds so it looks even better). I was nervous again. I think Bryce Remsburg is really cool, and I know I'm not alone in that regard. I have Bryce as a friend on Facebook, so I told him that, and he said, “and now, we're real-life friends.” I'm holding you to that Bryce...BE AFRAID. A second later, I saw the man himself, Mike Quackenbush, emerge from a door behind Bryce. I gave him a little salute, and he returned the gesture. I liked that. Quack is an inspiration to me because he makes things I'd like to do look effortless. Great sense of style as well.

I took the shirts and DVD out to my car for safe keeping. I realized how I was starting to feel more relaxed and enjoying myself like crazy. Hey, maybe I didn't have anyone riding with me to Chikara, but I definitely didn't feel lonely.

Also, I think it was during intermission (it might have actually been the end of the show, not sure) where another fan complimented me on my t-shirt. I was wearing a NERV logo t-shirt, which would be familiar to anyone who has watched Neon Genesis Evangelion. I had to shake their hand, because I had hoped that at some point, someone would compliment me on it. I wish I knew your name, but if you read this, you are officially in my Book of Awesome, as only one other person ever said anything about it (at a Magic: the Gathering Tournament, to further confirm my nerdiness to everyone).

Also also, during intermission, I met Babs. She gave me a hug. It was an excellent hug. This is where I tell you that if you're not listening to Chikara in 15 minutes, you need to start doing so.

Intermission eventually ended, and that means that it was time for...

MATCH #5: Devastation Corporation (Max Smashmaster/Blaster McMassive) vs The Colony (Fire Ant/Worker Ant)

*I thought the Devastation Corporation might be a bit lost without Sidney Bakabella there. I was wrong. Those are some scary dudes.
*When I talk about Chikara wrestlers I really like, I always feel guilty when I leave out Fire Ant and Worker Ant. They're awesome and everyone knows it. I take it for granted that everyone loves the Colony without complimenting their effort.
*This reminds me...I saw a picture of Worker Ant with a copy of Super Smash Bros 4 for the 3DS. I wonder...does Worker Ant have a Wii U, and will he be playing Smash on the Wii U when it comes out? I would love to get beat up by an Ant.
*This match was an awesome way to return from intermission. It was a high-energy match. Flying all over the place.
*Devastation Corporation won, and evil continued to spread through North Carolina.
*Fire Ant is a fantastic wrestler, and the fact that he isn't a highly paid superstar is a little crazy to me. If I won the lottery and started my own promotion (which wouldn't happen since I don't play the lottery), I would try to sign this guy to a huge contract immediately. Every match I've ever watched with Fire Ant in it, he always delivers.

Right around here is where I felt like I was hitting pro wrestling nirvana. It didn't smell like teen spirit, of course - more like sweaty wrestling mats. Not a bad smell though. Gavin came out to announce a match I was really looking forward to...

MATCH #6: Silver Ant v Shynron

*I saw Silver Ant as Green Ant in Kingsport. I have to be honest, I like the Silver Ant attire way more than the Green Ant attire, which wasn't bad.
*I expected solid mat wrestling early, and that happened.
*I also expected high flying stuff, especially from Shynron, and that happened.
*I didn't expect the ending. It was incredible. Shynron stood on the top rope, near the middle of the ring. He then jumped up to grab this low-hanging beam on the ceiling. Then, he worked his way to the middle, quickly, in total Ninja Warrior cliffhanger style. He swung and went for a backflip splash. Except...Silver Ant caught Shynron and pinned him. I couldn't believe what I'd just seen. The creativity, the risk...it was insane. The only thing I could compare it to was something I saw long ago. Way back in 1998, during my Sophomore year in college, I took a few friends to see ECW in Buffalo. Rob Van Dam did not one, but two somersault planchas from the top turnbuckle onto Bam Bam Bigelow (this was the match where RVD won his first TV title for ECW). If I remember correctly, Bam Bam caught RVD the second time. I believe this became part of the opening montage for ECW shows going forward. I never thought I would see anything top that sequence. I was wrong. Happily wrong.

Congratulations Shynron and Silver Ant, you are now the dual holders of the title of the Most Awesomest Thing I Have Ever Seen in Wrestling Award. For future reference, let's call it the MATIESWA award. At the fictional ceremony in my announcing your achievement, everyone gets cake. The most delicious cake of their choice. What about the award? It will be made of chocolate. Really good chocolate, not the cheap stuff.

It was now time for the MAIN EVENT OF THE EVENING.

Match #7: The Golden Trio and Eddie Kingston vs The Flood (Jimmy Jacobs, Nøkken, 17, Jacob Hammermeier)

*There was definitely some tension between Eddie Kingston and the Golden Trio. It definitely did not help their cause.
*Dasher Hatfield has my second favorite mask in Chikara. It's awesome.
*As I watched this match, I started to come to some startling realizations. Not to pat my own back, but I'm a pretty perceptive dude. I will not say in a public forum what I'm thinking because it wouldn't be fun. If I'm right, some really crazy things will happen at the next few shows.
*There was a lot of storytelling going on here. Apart from the tension in the tecnico trio, Eddie Kingston really wanted to get his hands on Jimmy Jacobs.
*I'd put the end result this way; the Golden Trio won the skirmish in the ring, but it seemed like the Flood won the actual battle with the post-match beat down and by increasing the tension between Icarus and Eddie Kingston.

Gavin asked us to give ourselves a round of applause. I agreed. I thought we were a decent crowd.

After the show, I wanted to buy some more stuff. I immediately went to the Osirian Portal's booth and wanted to buy an Ophidian shirt and talk to the man himself. I remembered that he posted pictures of him and Worker Ant playing Magic: the Gathering at the YOLT expansion pack. I was really sad that I didn't get to go to the expansion pack, partially due to that. I asked Ophidian about M:TG and found out that he used to be a tournament-level player. Impressive. If there's one little dream type of thing I would like to do, it would be to draft with Ophidian and Worker Ant (and any other Chikara stars who would like to do such a thing).

It was at this point where I felt a hand on my shoulder. Not just any hand, mind you. It was the hand of one Mr. Ashley Remington Esq. He put his arm around me and said, to Ophidian, Amasis, and everyone else who was looking, that I was a great fan. He told them I was standing and cheering my heart out all night long. That...oh the feels. It meant a ton to me. I cheer because I'm enjoying myself, immersing myself in the experience. To realize that wrestlers in Chikara notice what the fans are doing and give them a pat on the back – that was pretty meaningful. Thank you, Ashley Remington, for making a guy feel significant when he was alone on his birthday trip to Chikara. It just reinforces one strong truth about Chikara – Chikara always gives back if you make an effort. They appreciate the support.

Finally, I went back to the Smart Mark Video lady. I said “I wish I could use a credit card, I would totally buy King of Trios.” Guess what...techmology had advanced, and I was indeed able to buy King of Trios 2014! SWEET! More wrestling is a good thing.

So, all in all, I picked up 3 shirts, You Only Live Twice, and King of Trios 2014 for $125. Solid value on the merchandise.

More importantly, for $20, I got to feel happy – like a kid again – to celebrate my birthday (a few days early).

Thanks for rocking, Chikara.

-ICTimer aka Jeremiah Blair (aka Mark Markerson, amirite?)

Our minds can be our own worst enemies at times. There are always barriers to overcome in any important endeavor. For me, at least, one of the biggest barriers I have to overcome on a daily basis is my constant self-doubt and anxiety. This short reflection is about a small victory that was influenced by, of all things, professional wrestling. That may sound very strange, almost unbelievable – but one thing I've learned from Chikara is to suspend my disbelief, trust my instincts, and just have fun.

In an effort to not bore anyone with my full life story and all my problems, but to get straight to the point, it will help to disclose one thing that shapes my world daily. That is anxiety. I have received, and am still receiving, treatment and therapy due to my anxiety. It's hard to explain it fully to people – and sometimes, the response I get – from people who are genuinely just trying to help – is “stop worrying so much!” Suffice it to say, I'm also a good listener, and I have tried to do this alone. But it didn't work. I have tried a lot of things to make the anxiety go away, and while some have been destructive, some have been very positive.

But, as much as I hate to admit it, no matter how much self-reflection, therapy, and optimism I develop, there is always a strong thought process in my mind telling me that what I'm doing is worthless, wrong, pointless, and even destructive and unlikable. I have gained some insight into why that is, and I realize that a large part of overcoming this anxiety is to take risks. The best ways I've been able to help myself, and those around me, are when I acknowledge just how nervous I am to do something, but do it anyway. And if there is one thing I am extremely nervous about, it's actually letting other people read the things I write.

And yet...you're reading this right now. So obviously, at least for now, I've overcome this anxiety to get a victory – a positive feeling – regardless of what happens from here. Even if everyone thinks this is garbage, even if that anxious little voice in my head is somewhat right, it doesn't matter because I actually accomplished something. I actually did something! Yay! SUPA DANCE PARTY!

“But Jeremiah,” you're thinking, “that's great and all, but where does this professional wrestling come in? Where does this Chikara thingy come in?”

Simple. I have had this good feeling many times before – the feeling of happiness in actually taking a risk, in doing something despite my reservations, of abandoning my fears and worries even for a brief period and having fun.

October 8, 2011, I attended my first – and sadly only, to this point – Chikara live show. It was titled “Klunk in Love,” and happened in Kingsport, Tennessee. For months, I was excited about the possibility of going. I became interested in Chikara a few years prior, and really enjoyed what I had seen. Finally! Chikara live, less than an hour away from my home in Middleofnowheresville, Virginia (not the actual name of my town, of course, but it might as well be). I recruited a couple of friends to come with me, and they were just as excited after they started getting into Chikara. So I was really excited.

I was also incredibly anxious about it. For whatever reason, my anxious nature kept telling me, “dude, this is going to be a disaster for you, just watch.” My anxiety truly knows no bounds, and I can come up with the craziest scenarios when I'm in that anxious mode. “What if my friends hate it, and decide they don't want to be my friend anymore because it was that bad?” “What if I accidentally offend a wrestler or Chikara staff member, and they all hate me forever?”

I couldn't have been more nervous walking into the show.

Then Gavin Loudspeaker came out, warming up the crowd. He was so enthusiastic, and obviously having fun. I started to relax a little bit. But I was still nervous. Gavin announced the first match, and the entrance music started...

Marching band music...

Then Archibald Peck emerged, in full drum major regalia, and led his entourage (at that time, Veronica and COLT CABUNNY who I, like the rest of the crowd, immediately started cheering because it's COLT CABUNNY) to the ring. One of my anxieties – that my friends wouldn't like it – immediately disappeared as I heard my friends behind me laughing hysterically. “Well...at least they're happy,” I thought. And I began to relax and really enjoy the show.

There were too many enjoyable things that happened that night – too many little, entertaining details – for me to actually recount ALL of them without missing something. Having said that, here were a few of my favorites:

-”BOTTOM ROPE! BOTTOM ROPE!” Yes, there was an unplanned star that night – the bottom rope. I'm no expert in wrestling ring engineering, so I'm not sure exactly WHY it happened, but the bottom rope went slack, then came off the ring posts completely, during the the first match. There were attempts to fix it all night, but it wouldn't cooperate. Of course, the show went on, and eventually, the bottom rope chant started. I'm not a big fan of wrestling crowd chants in general, but it was pretty great, and easy to join in.

-Chuck Taylor's almost unbelievable hi-pitched screams. I bet there are aspiring opera sopranos that wish they could hit those notes.

-Ophidian's kindness during intermission. I was still a bit intimidated, and one friend that also attended is extremely shy. Ophidian was so nice, enthusiastic, and funny that even she, one of the most shy people I know, posed for a picture with him. It was really cool.

-Hallowicked bringing a vegetable tray out from backstage and sharing it with the crowd. No joke.

-A little interaction that only a few people near me might have fully caught. Tursas and Green Ant fought their way through the crowd to the back. At one point, when Green Ant got the upper hand, Tursas pulled a kid in front of him, as a shield. The kid was bewildered (as I would have been), and his mom was NOT happy about it. But as they walked away, the kid seemed fine. His mom asked, “are you okay?” He said, “yeah...but he SMELLS.” I couldn't stop laughing (probably one of those “you had to be there things”).

As we left, several of the wrestlers formed a receiving line near the exit, to thank all the fans for coming. I have been to many wrestling shows, and I have honestly never seen anything like that. It was just the icing on the cake – the fact that these performers, who worked hard to entertain us all night – would be humble enough to even wish us well and thank us for coming.

That Chikara show was definitely one of the most fun nights I've had as a wrestling fan. It was definitely the best wrestling show I've ever seen. Notice that I mentioned all the little details without talking about the wrestling? That was one of the craziest things I took away. The in-ring action was awesome. The matches were all fun to watch. But they were just one facet of an overall experience that I can't say enough good things about.

But when I go back to my original point – here's, for me, the coolest take away I had from Chikara. As I returned home (after a car ride filled with a basic discussion of “oh man, and what about THAT? AND THAT? Man that was awesome), I realized something else.

The anxiety, the nervousness, I had before the show, was gone. I felt happy – with no reservations. I think part of that was due to the quality of the entertainment. But there was another factor. I realized that for all of the reservations, the anxiety, I had before going to the show – all of the times I second and third and fourth guessed whether I should even bother, and all of the doomsday scenarios that floated through my head – I still went ahead, took the risk, and went to the show. And for a brief moment, I felt better about myself.

When I sat down to write this, I had similar thoughts of anxiety. “What if I write this and everyone hates it?” “What if I write this and no one reads it?” “What if I pour out a few words, open a little window to my world, and nothing good comes of it?”

Then, I thought back to that one October night, where I had those same reservations, and realized when I just took the chance to see Chikara, I had a great time.

That's why I'm enthusiastic about Chikara. That's how pro wrestling helped me, how Chikara helped me, if only for one night, overcome my constant worries, be myself, and have fun.

And that's why I pass this on to others. Check out Chikara sometime – you'll find something you like, and you won't be disappointed.

And even if you don't love it – at least you took a chance. At least you tried something new. And that can be rewarding in itself.

Thanks for reading.